Is This Premise for a Romantic Triad a Good One, or Not? Is It Too Cliche? Why or Why Not?

Question by Heisenberg: Is this premise for a romantic triad a good one, or not? Is it too cliche? Why or why not?
Bob and Jill have been dating since High School.

Bob started doing cocaine, and doesn’t want to play football anymore. He doesn’t even have a useful major in college. Jill wants to break up with him.

While on a date, Bob goes through a phase of withdrawal. His friend stop by, and he goes to snort cocaine with them, leaving Jill to wait for food alone.

Cobb shows up, winks at Jill, then decides to sit with her. He flirts with her a little bit, and they (she is reluctant) exchange numbers. He leaves before Bob gets back.

Soon, the city ends up going into chaos because people are rioting. Bob and Jill were driving to an evacuation center, but Bob, being neurotic and high, wrecks. Jill calls Cobb.

Cobb shows up, gives them both a ride to the evacuation zone where there are lots of people.

Bob and Jill are split up. Cobb saves Jill from a stampede.

They go to find Bob, who has found a group and called Jill.

Bob and Jill have sex. Cobb gets jealous, and starts to mope around. Other people notice, and warn him to get his act together. Cobb does so.

Bob finds an old rival within the group, and ends up beating him to death with his own revolver. Jill tries to stop him. Bob tries to shoot Jill, without realizing it’s Jill. Thankfully, the revolver wasn’t loaded, showing how good of a guy the rival was. Jill and Bob are effectively OVER.

Other things happen, Cobb goes crazy and becomes a dictator of the new society. Jill becomes queen. Bob redeems himself as a good(ish) person.

So… If actually written well, would this be able to avoid the “bad love triangle” concept?

Please, your contribution really helps, so if there is anything you’d change or want eliminated, PLEASE mention how you feel.

Best answer:

Answer by Katie
I just cannot take the name Bob seriously…

That aside, I think it does make for a good story, if done correctly. All of this hinges on your ability to write good characters. Good luck, may your words flow forevermore.

Answer by Hypno Toad
I think romantic triads are a bit tired right now. Every story with this premise that comes out is referred to as the new “Twilight”. Even The Hunger Games films which have existed as books for a while were referred to as this. A dystopian Twilight.

If you are really passionate about your story and about how solid your characters are then go for it. The ending looks a bit crazy. Is she Cobb’s Queen of the new society? Or is she just Queen? If Bob redeems himself, how will Cobb and Jill (if how I understood it is true)?

Just don’t make the relationship too one-sided with Cobb looking like the better man. It will make Bob seem even worse, and that he is abusive as a boyfriend (even if he isn’t… is he? I don’t know).

The way you wrote “doesn’t even have a major in college” is kind of a pathetic thing to be highlighting compared to the drug abuse and almost murder of Jill and the dictatorship (??!) doesn’t it?

Anyway… it’s your vision. If this is your vision, then write it. There is nothing to stop you from having them all be friends with an underlying romantic relationship between Jill and Cobb and her sleeping with Bob once because she is in the moment with him. You don’t always need to overcomplicate relationships with labels. It’s your call!

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